Being in an argument isn’t something most people are comfortable with. It’s a nerve-racking experience that can sometimes result in hard feelings and severed relationships. Once you’re in an argument it’s pretty hard to end it. Of course, there are those who enjoy arguing with others so they do what they can to escalate the argument. Here are 10 things people say that escalate arguments, and prolong the inevitable; no one wins.
“You’re just being ridiculous.”
This is a sure-fire way to not only keep an argument going, but escalate it to a whole other level. The last thing someone wants to hear when they’re trying to prove their point in the middle of an argument is that what they are saying is ridiculous. Talk about a slap in the face. You might as well call them a two year old, and tell them to go take a time out.
“F-ck you”
Ouch! That’s got a bite to it even without the argument. No one likes to have someone else say something like that to them. If their blood wasn’t boiling before it’s said, it certainly will be after it’s said. F-ck you has an almost a venomous quality to it that will make the other person’s heart start racing, and get them fired up even more.
“Get over it will you?”
Telling someone to get over it is like telling them their point of view is childish, and insignificant. In the heat of an argument, no one wants to feel as if they are being treated as a child. The fact that the disagreement escalated into an argument is proof enough that they are passionate about their point of view. Telling them to get over it won’t do anything but enrage them even more.
“You’re not making any sense”
Telling someone you’re in an argument with that they aren’t making any sense implies to them that you don’t understand what it is they’re trying to tell you. Why will this escalate an argument? When you consider that the person has already been trying to get you to understand their views before it escalated into an argument they will surely become frustrated that you are still not getting it.
“What’s the big deal?”
Just like telling someone they are ridiculous, asking them what the big deal is will make them feel as if you feel they are being foolish and childish; another great way to escalate an argument.
That’s just too bad
Yet another perfect way to escalate an argument. This implies that no matter what the other person says, you’re not ever going to agree with them, and they are just going to have to live with it. Ouch!
That’s your problem not mine
When a person argues with you, it’s usually because they want you to see their point. Want to dismiss someone else’s point of view entirely and send them into a fit? Tell them that it’s their problem, and watch the sparks fly.
Trudi Buck provides information on both where and how to obtain a master in counseling.